What I Learned From Losing 90 Pounds And Regaining 40

An even bigger surprise than people treating me differently after I lost weight was how I started to treat other people differently. My expectations for others became very unfair. I started to fall into the habit of judging other people I saw on the street. I would get frustrated when I was walking behind a bigger person who was walking slowly, or I would judge someone for taking the bus just two stops. This was the scariest part of losing weight.

Being overweight my entire life had meant that I was part of a somewhat marginalized group. By losing weight, I suddenly had more privilege and I quickly started to marginalize the "other" people. I had to work very hard to remind myself that I have no idea what other people are going through. Although I had lost 90 pounds, I still wasn't stick thin and people probably still judged me if they saw me walking around with an ice cream in my hand.

I had to remind myself that the person who took the bus two stops might have another physical condition that prevents them from walking long distances. The overweight person I see eating McDonald's might be having a treat after months of strict clean eating. Even if neither of those were true, even if that person taking the bus just two stops didn't feel like walking, and even if the other person eating McDonald's eats it every day, I also had to realize that it's absolutely none of my business.

Just as how what I eat and how I behave isn't any of their business. I have no room to judge anyone for the choices they make. It was a hard realization to come to, but once I did, it not only made me a better person, it made me a better personal trainer for my clients. I could meet them where they were rather than expecting them to begin their journey at my unrealistic expectations.