10 Quotes That Live Rent-Free in Fans’ Heads

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation is a holiday classic filled with hilarious and heartfelt moments that remain in fans hearts.

When it comes to Christmas movies, nothing evokes the spirit of the holidays more than National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. The film is hailed as a holiday classic and continues to be on fans' watch lists when the festive season rolls around. This third entry in the National Lampoon’s Vacation series is considered the best due to its charm and hilarious script.

Christmas Vacation revolves around the Griswolds doing their best to celebrate the holidays. Like most Griswold vacations, nothing goes according to plan - from lights not working to Christmas trees going up in flames and even kidnappings. Written by John Hughes, the Christmas movie has hilarious and memorable moments that live in fans' hearts even 32 years after the film's initial release.

"We're Not Driving All The Way Out Here So You Can Get One Of Those Stupid Ties With The Santa Clauses On It, Are We Dad?"

Christmastime is often filled with family traditions. In Christmas Vacation, the film begins with the Griswold family setting out to do a favorite seasonal pastime together; finding the perfect Christmas tree. 

All piled in their four-wheel sleigh, the Griswold family searches for the “most important Christmas symbols.” Clark and Ellen are having a blast but in the backseat, Audrey and Russ appear rather unimpressed. The two look like they would rather be anywhere else. When Clark reveals what the family is doing, it prompts Audrey to question it in a deadpan manner. The way Juliette Lewis delivers the line makes the quote all the more memorable. 

"I'm Sleeping With Your Father."

Part of the holidays is getting together with the ones you love. One of the things that Clark wants for Christmas is to have a big family Christmas at their house. After a hilarious moment when the whole family arrives, a conversation occurs between mother and daughter that adds a laugh or two. 

The two women are preparing dinner in the kitchen and Audrey lets out her frustration to her mother over the awkward new sleeping arrangements. She asks her mother; “Do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how sick and twisted that is?” Ellen’s response is classic. The conversation continues until Ellen ends it with the simple Christmas truth that, “It’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.”

"Why Is The Carpet All Wet Todd? / I Don't Know Margo!"

Christmas Vacation is complete with hilarious one-liners but they're not all delivered by the Griswolds. In fact, a lot of memorable lines are said by characters not part of the Griswold family tree. The Griswold’s next-door neighbors, Todd and Margo, played by Nicholas Guest and Julia Louis-Dreyfus, deliver one of the best quotes in the film. 

Clark is determined to have the best-decorated house in the neighborhood even if that means displaying over a thousand strands of lights. While stapling lights to the roof, Clark slips and falls sending a piece of the gutter flying. It crashes into the neighbor's bedroom window and inadvertently breaks their stereo. When the couple arrives home and finds the mess, each one questions the other in a hilarious conversation that still tickles fans every time they watch it. 

"So Do Washing Machines."

All Clark Griswold wants is a perfect Christmas. His idea of a perfect holiday includes a big family getting together, receiving his Christmas bonus, and a light display of grand proportions. 

After going hard on decorating every inch of his house, the moment has come for the big reveal. The whole family gathers outside but nothing happens. After watching Clark work so hard on the decoration, it’s kind of a letdown. Clark’s mother-in-law snorts with disapproval. Audrey quickly defends her father expressing that he worked really hard on it and this prompts Art, Clark’s father-in-law, to be quick with his line about washing machines. It’s a perfect response.

"Every Time Catherine Revved Up The Microwave, I'd P*** My Pants and Forget Who I Was."

Unwelcome guests can make life either exciting or downright unpleasant. This is especially true when that unwelcome guest is Cousin Eddie, his family, and their dog Snots. During the second big light reveal, the family slips in unnoticed and shocks everyone - including Clark. 

Along with Clark Griswold, Cousin Eddie delivers Christmas Vacation's funniest quotes. One of his best lines comes during another family Christmas outing; sledding. With a new noncaloric silicon-based kitchen lubricant, Clark wipes it all over his sled for fast sledding. Eddie wants nothing to do with it as he reminds Clark about the metal plate in his head. Eddie’s line about the microwave is typical Eddie.

"Rocky Bit My Thumb."

Ruby Sue and Rocky are the only kids of Uncle Eddie's who appear in Christmas Vacation. Despite not having a lot of screen time, Ruby Sue delivers some memorable, and funny, quotes.

Clark Griswold is expecting a Christmas bonus from work and plans to build a pool with it. One night, Clark stays up and imagines what it would be like and as Clark daydreams, Ruby Sue sneaks downstairs. With her uncle dressed in his red pajamas, she mistakes him for Santa. When asked why she is up late, she replies with the out-of-left-field response. She says it so quickly, it even shocks Clark. Later on, she adds “Sh*ttin' bricks,” which makes her small scene so priceless.

"Fixed The Newel Post."

Played by Chevy Chase, Clark Griswold has Christmas Vacation’s funniest quotes. There are some lines, however, that are perfectly ordinary yet are still amusing for viewers. The one line that stands out references another holiday classic, It’s A Wonderful Life. 

Christmas Eve is not turning out jolly for the Griswolds. Clark, still wearing his Santa outfit and wielding a chainsaw, makes his way down the stairs to try to save what’s left of the night. He stops when he notices the newel post is loose. It's Wonderful Life saw Jimmy Stewart constantly being frustrated by a creaky post. Here, Clark is finally able to do what Jimmy Stewart can't. With the chainsaw, he hacks the post off and utters the iconic line.

"You Couldn't Hear A Dump Truck Driving Through A Nitroglycerin Plant."

It’s Christmas Eve and some new guests arrive at the house. Aunt Bethany and Uncle Lewis deliver some zany one-liners. Most are said by Aunt Bethany when they first arrive like “Is your house on fire?” But the best line comes from Uncle Lewis during the moment leading up to one of Christmas Vacation's funniest scenes. 

After Clark goes berserk and chops a tree down to replace the old one, the family gathers in the living room to try to salvage the evening. While Clark puts presents under the new tree, a squeaky sound is heard by Aunt Bethany who asks if anyone else hears it. The exchange afterward between husband and wife still makes fans snort with laughter.

"We're Going To Have The Happiest Christmas Since Bing Crosby Tap Danced With Danny F***ing Kaye."

Nothing about Christmas for the Griswolds has gone according to plan. In fact, everything has burst into flames, literally. With one disaster piling up after the other and Clark going crazy, the family decides to call it quits.

This doesn’t sit right with Clark who is determined to make Christmas special even if everyone is in hell. Just like a captain who goes down with his ship, Clark wants to see the disaster through and wants his family to stay on the sinking ship. “We’re all in this together.” He says, adding the Bing Crosby line. 

"He Was A Beastly, Bulging Man."

Throughout Christmas Vacation, the Griswolds have suffered disasters such as a Christmas tree bursting in flames, light displays not working, and Clark receiving a year membership to the jelly of the month club instead of his bonus.

But the film doesn’t end the calamity there, it has one more disaster to offer up to the Griswolds. The film ends with Cousin Eddie committing an act of felony; kidnapping Clark’s boss. When Mr. Shirley’s wife telephones the police, she describes the assailant. With viewers knowing Eddie is the culprit and having witnessed Eddie’s weird antics over the course of the movie, the description is perfectly and hilariously accurate.

NEXT: 5 Ways Christmas Vacation is The Funniest Christmas Movie (& 5 Its Krampus)